KNOWING

Monthly, PremRawat.com publishes first-person reflections from people around the world who are experiencing the benefits of practicing the techniques of Self-Knowledge as taught by Prem Rawat– a simple way to turn one’s attention from the outside world to a place of inner peace. Each individual’s reflections are unique, based on their own life experiences. This month’s reflection is from Madeleine McCrea, currently residing in Sydney, Australia.

I can write only of my own experience. I was born in Australia in 1953, so yes, back in time we go. 

As far back as I can remember, I had a thirst deep inside me. Around the age of five, whilst lying in bed at night trying to sleep, I would be overcome by a vast urge to rush into the kitchen to ask my mother, “Mum, who am I, what am I, what is this?”

My mother, who was finally getting a moment’s peace, would answer:

“You’re Madeleine McRae, you’re my daughter, now go to bloody sleep!”

After about four attempts, I realized that she obviously didn’t have the answer to such a question and that I must find out for myself. In her defense, she had the answers for everything else. 

I grew up in the 60’s and 70’s, that being the hippie era, beset with the best music and myriad opportunities for a girl like me to roam and pursue freedom. 

Yes, I was a hippie. I was also in the most envied rock musical of the time, HAIR.

When you want to know what it’s all about,
just find Prem Rawat.

Though I was supposedly beautiful and talented enough to pursue many career opportunities, my heart was still set on finding my true self, my own personal, internal connection to that energy, that divinity within.

I knew it must exist as I longed for it so. Many of my generation were of the same mind.

I was living in Amsterdam at 19, but decided to catch that hippie bus that went overland to India. There, I thought, I might find my teacher, someone able to reveal the answer to my longing. Did I know what the teacher would look like? Did I know that I would recognize the teacher and the experience? I knew that my mind had no idea, but I also knew my heart would know.

After searching many months in India, I received a letter from my sister, who was in Australia studying medicine.

She simply said, “When you want to know what it’s all about, just find Prem Rawat.”

I trusted her completely and beat a barefoot path to Haridwar, where I had heard he had a place.

When I got there, I was able to stay, though Prem had already left for the West, embarking upon his journey of spreading Self-Knowledge to the world.

I lived in Haridwar for six weeks until I was shown the techniques of how one turns their senses and attention within to what is already there. This is what Prem calls “Knowledge”.

For me, the experience I have practicing Knowledge is like the rudder on a boat, my resting place, shelter from the dualities of life, my true home that is always with me, always accompanying me.

I have been practicing these simple techniques for 50 years and my love and gratitude for this gift grows daily.

When I go deeply into my inner world by practicing the techniques of Self-Knowledge, I am replenished by a love that is gentle and all-encompassing. Indeed, it is a love affair with the Divine within me – one that can last until my last breath.

To know how to go inside and be able to bask in this heartfelt experience has taught me many lessons. I am now more able to release the conceptual prisons I hold in my mind. I have a greater capacity to be simple and love unconditionally without judgment and attachment. Practicing Knowledge has given me the ability to be fully in the moment. I no longer miss the beauty of what is unfolding right before my eyes.

Inside myself I have found true freedom. Everything else changes. The energy within is the only constant.

Words are seriously inadequate for trying to describe the benefits of personally experiencing the world within. Everything I want and need is waiting patiently within, waiting for me to come home to myself.

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